Entry #21: I hate people

So there's somethings wrong with how my phone interfaces with blogger, so I think y'all can't see the title. Also, woo, my blog can drink now.

Okay, so I hate people. I'm not talking about a specific person, I'm talking about people as a whole. When I was grounded I couldn't see peopleso much that i actually grew to like being alone and  not around other people. And now, but now that I actually have the chance to see my friends and socialize and all that shit... I don't want to. I want to sit at home and be left alone with the friends that  I have  in my head. I like my solitude, my cage. It's comforting. And calm. Ish. I don't know if it's just that... I just don't know, really. Like... I'm just so frustrated at so many people, and no one understands but myself, and I can't explain it without being insane! I used to love people. All the time I would yearn to talk and yadda yadda. So did I change? Or did the people change? Maybe it's both. I don't know.

Entry #20: This is John

Hello everyone! I'm John. This is my first blog... Hmmmm... A bit about myself? I live in Luke's head, I am everything he wants to be, and as his ship was sinking he took his good traits and put them into me. I'll post from time to time, more frequently as he lets me take over more. So! Some fun things happened at work. Like when we ended, I said we were closing, right? Well, I got a comment from a fellow lifeguard that I sounded too mean. So I rephrased it. "good night everyone, and I hope you had a pleasant stay. Please leave the pool in a timely manner... BEFORE I TAZE THE WATER!" Not surprisingly, it cleared the water very quickly. I have more, but honestly I'm tired. Luke's already asleep. Good night!

Entry #19: Pick up Tricks a la Luke

Am I feeling good? No, not really. But fuck it, this shit's important. I can't type, been too busy throwing my life away and killing brain cells, but I'll try to use proper spelling. Alright. Okay. Thanks John. John, I understand. Anyways, moving on. So, how to pick up hot babes. I got this. Hold on. Yeah, this is actual legitimate advice. However, I suck at following my own advice, so This is why I'm a single lonely asshole. John cooler, but I tell him to shut up. He's a nice guy. AAAANNNYWAYS, moving on again. 

Rule #1: Be yourself. Sounds cheesy as fuck, but it's true as fuck too. Have a good sense of who the fuck you are. A lot of people (I've done this myself, too) go "Oh, if I just change who I am and become who she/he wants me to be, I'll finally find love and they'll love me forever and..." listen, if that mofo doesn't love you for you then they're not worth your time! Got it? You are you. Not anyone else.

Rule #2: Be confident. People are attracted to confidence. Now, there isn't much to explain about confidence, but here are some tips on how to gain it.
          1.) Make eye contact with people as you walk bye. And, and. If they make eye contact with you, smile. Smile and beam at them. Don't give some sissy ass half smile. Smile with your teeth. Smile like you mean it. It'll make their day and increase your comfort level with other people, not to mention if they're someone you need to be dealing with like a cashier, they'll prolly to a better job at it. That leads us to...

          2.) Talk to people. Now, I know my viewership, and they're a bunch of insane people so let me clarify. Talk to people WHO YOU HAVE A REASONABLE REASON to talk to, and talk about SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE things. For example, your cashier. Or waiter. Or someone walking in the same direction as you, alone. People like this. Bring up a movie you watched, or a tv show you like, or a game you played, or a popular event which happened. Something. Start a conversation. Again, it'll boost your skills talking with people, and make their day.

Rule #3: Don't let rejection punch you in the face. If you get rejected, IMMEDIATELY move on. Don't linger, don't let it get you down. Once you're rejected, especially by a person whom you don't have a friendship with, they cease to exist. Poof. They're gone. So, move on. Find another one, a better one. You've got this shit.

And there you have it folks. How to be successful with the people you want to be with. It ain't complicated, but it may be hard to enact. I know I have problems. But, if you follow this, I promise you'll find someone good for you. Unless you have really bad skills at finding compatible people. Then you're screwed. But other than that... you've got this shit. Go and get 'em.