Entry #11: I'm back...?

Ya not really... Dad's out at work (Working on Christmas week whyy?!?!?!?) but that means I get to use the computer. Kinda illegally. Shhhhhhh.... So!

We are doing a talent show today. A talent show. Of my family people. This is gonna be entertaining, right? I'll see if I can record it for my viewers.

Don't play Taboo with me. You'll lose. I don't think I have ever lost a game of Taboo. And I've played it a hell of a lot of times. EVEN when I'm tired.

I've had a complaint (Singular, because I posses a following of one) That I don't talk enough.  I don't say enough about what happens because I've become SO FRICKIN' ACCLIMATED TO THE CRAZY SHIT THAT HAPPENS IN MY LIFE THAT IT ISN'T CRAZY TO ME! So I probably won't tell you the full picture because I won't think to put it in... (If you want a better blog, see my friend)

I apparently am metro sexual. But hey, I'll take the label if it means I get to keep the designer watch and jacket.

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I don't talk enough, do I? I think I'm gonna buy a camera. That way, I can just ramble on and on and not worry about typing these words...

I asked my family why they used proof to measure the alcohol content of liquor  Each proof is 1/2%... It's not logical! Then we had some historical debate about it. Something about flash points and putting it into a pan  to set it on fire to prove it had alcohol. Sounds inefficient, right? Why don't we just drink it? One said. I said we should soak a cloth in the stuff, put that into a bottle of the liquid, and set the cloth on fire. Throw that at people and stuff. (Molotov cocktail came up in Taboo while I was playing. Insta win!)

Don't put me around fire. Also not a good idea.

Entry #10: Fall Curtain Call

Well, fall show is over. Just struck the set. It's official. Kinda sad, but... at least there's winter show, right? The work on that starts tomorrow. Aaaaanyways, my sister's pool birthday party was yesterday. Kind of a late birthday party, but we had to wait for the pool to be completed... She's 6 years old! And tougher than the average 6 year old guy... or the above average 6 year old guy... I almost have pity for the guys her age. There's gonna be a lot of broken hearts. And broken bones. Back to me! After the last show, I saw my two duplicates in the real world, Zena and Top Hat. Hadn't seen them in like... 2 months. It was very fun. Then I went to a party. At BJ's, the best named restaurant ever. Also, has excellent food. Um, I really don't have anything else to say, really. This is sad... I don't have enough things happen in my life!

Edit: Well, as you can see I don't write enough, so I strongly encourage any readers to go to this blog here deeplyconfusinghighlyamusing.blogspot.com for the more complete story, at least in this case.

Entry #9: Srsly, Calc?

Ya, It's been a while. I know. I'm a lazy person who doesn't post on his blog consistently... But, I'm back! My show opened, it was amazing, still going on tomorrow and Saturday. Also, I made Winter Show! They've Been Wrong Before, written by my theater teacher. I'm playing the part of Mike, the sarcastic down to earth awesome dude. I think I was type cast... well, I like the part so I'm cool with it. I've been sick, tired, and sick and tired of being sick and tired for the past month, so that's the reason I haven't been posting. Kinda need all the time you can get when one's been getting home at 9:00 and is in all pre-ap/Ap classes. It makes one stressed, and then get sick, which also requires more sleep. I just need sleep. Sleep is nice. I must get all the sleep! However, on a note of my life, I have the strangest friends. I do. One of them is actually part of the reason I'm sticking with this whole blog thing (Kinda) because she has one. And so, being the sick man I am at the moment, my friends prescribe me cures. It'd be fun, but I only get TWO THINGS! DRINK TEA AND SLEEP! I ALREADY KNOW THIS PEOPLE! So, to break the chain, my friend Zena (Check out her blog here http://deeplyconfusinghighlyamusing.blogspot.com/ [Her's is much better than mine, and gets updated more frequently. I blame it on practice]) prescribes sex. Straight up sex. Which of course is the perfect cure for anything, except STDs. Even if it doesn't actually "Cure" anything, it helps about as much as medicinal Marijuana (Which is to say a lot).

Also, I want to make a pledge that I will attempt to write in this blog once a week, on Friday (Friday, because I want to add all the fun things from the week before). Thank you all, my internet sucks as it has gone out twice since I started writing this post, good night!

Entry #8: Tiiirrreeeedddd

Okay, so I haven't posted in forever. I'm kinda sorry, but you have to understand that I've been busy with theater  Like, extremely busy. And then there was homecoming on Saturday  Went well, but I WAS 2 FLIPPIN' HOURS LATE! TWO! IT WAS A FOUR HOUR EVENT! I  JOINED HALF WAY! It wasn't the greatest from what I heard, but STILL! I had to miss dinner with my date. Ya. It wasn't the greatest. Sooooo.... My show opens on Thursday. I can't free advertise will keeping with anonymity, so sorry, but if you know who I am then you know the one and the time and place I'm talking about. To any random person who decided to read this, sorry. Um.... ya. That;s really all, mainly because I'm tired as (insert some swear here I don't even...). Thank you all, and good night!

Entry #7: Something

You'll probably get this a lot. I really don't have much to say but I feel obligated to say something so i'm gonna do it. That's what this blog is. Bullet time!

1.) I'm not going to get perma grounded! Got my grades under control so I can be alive for the next 9 weeks. Yay!

2.) My PSAT is tomorrow. I got this! Ya! Standardized testing? BRING IT ON!!!!!

3.) I updated my DA so that it is now an actual site. Yay. Ya. If you want to follow me, my name is TheColdCalculation.

Love y'all!

Entry #6: Literature

Sorry for my delay, I'm lazy and am amazed that I still remember about this thing. Okay, so I hate literature teachers. they are hypocrites and they ruin stories for me. With that said, I love books and poetry. I read avidly, and if anyone wants to recommend a book for me to read I would really love that. I also write. My poems are weird though. For example, my friend asked me to tell her a story. I gave her this:


There once was a man of the age of 23
 who decided to go out and live in a tree
however, the tree was not ordinary
and the man grew as strong and fast as could be
he flaunted his gifts with great skill and ease
to a great many mansions and cars he got keys
till men cross the world wanted their own trees
"but none," he said, "were as good as these."
so all came from far and wide
to find the special tree in which to reside
but the trees were quite shyand went to hide
which left everyone to try and decide
decide what to do, they wanted the might
of the man in the tree, and great eyesight
and the glow, with it's wonder and light
so that they could all succeed in a fight
"love me, long for me, pine for my eye,
but none shall be as wonderful as I,"
said the man as he feasted on turkey and rye
and he soon gained the ability to fly
all the girls swooned
all the men fumed
and all through the streets the great man zoomed
till the men got jealous, wanting the power for theirs
so they all saddled up the mates of their mares
and rode into battle against the man with his luscious hair
and the man just sat, for he did not care
so the men came to fight, with knives and their gun
and the man just sat, did not even run
saying, "do this alot, it's really quite fun,
I love getting back massages, son."
so everyone gave up, and the man gained great fame
and I just might go out and do the same
so let this be a leason put to my name
live in a tree if you don't want to be lame


Ya, I'm odd. However, it was fun. If anyone wants a poem from me, just give me a topic and I'll write it. Preferably not something inappropriate or stupid. Preferably. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Entry #5: FRIIIDDDAAYYY!!!

No I'm not going to start singing. Today. However, I am going to say that Fridays are awesome because I like sleep and Friday means that I get to sleep in the next day for as long as I want. Or at least, that's what it's SUPPOSED to mean. However, as the avid theater maniac that I am, I have rehearsals with call at 10 a.m. which means to get there at 9:45. Now, while waking up at 8 really isn't that bad, I want to sleep till 10! OR 12! I get too little sleep as it is. It's breaking apart my mind, opening all my little cabinets in there and making them spill all over the metaphorical floor. Oh ya, I have self diagnosed split personalities. They're really all my large emotions but each one is basically it's own person so I give them names. While I'm not always Cold Calculation, that's the name I'll call my self here. I think I'll abbreviate it to Calc when I'm actually my normal(ish) self. *Yawn* Sleep!!!!

Entry #4: Guilt

I'm sorry. I really am.
I have a serious flaw. It's called laziness. It makes me not want to post here. At all. And then I feel bad. It's mainly because sense my life is so... unusual... at all times, I become acclimated to it and then don't post all of the interesting things. I apologize. However, I would like to say that I reign supreme in chess because I beat... his name is... Hitler. His name is Hitler. Ya. I beat him. I dismembered him. And so I end.

Entry #3: My Bro

Well now, I want to say something off the bat. I'm not gay. I'm not. I'm secure in my masculinity. I'm so secure that I can act gay and not feel bad about it. Now that that is established, I can move on with my life.
I have an interesting friend named... His name is... Um... DatSexyBeast. We'll call him that. We bonded last year over our fall show, Jekyll and Hyde. It was fun. We're bros, to the point where we can do whatever the flip we want to do to each other and it isn't weird. He.... He's interesting. We are. The two of us. Gotta love him!

Entry #2: I Remember!

I just have to say that if my friend Zena can find this, it will be hilarious. I actually remembered why I started writing this! My idol in both comedy and StarCraft, Day[9], started writing a blog. I figured I should start, too. If this blog accomplishes anything, it's to plug day9.tv as much as possible. Thank you. Go there. Now. If you see this. Which probably no one will. But who cares?

Entry #1: The Pilot

I've never done this before. I don't know why I'm doing this, but I shall. These blogs shall be irregular, incoherent, and generally nothingness. However, I hope that I will somehow be entertaining. Somehow. Anyways, my life is comedy and tragedy, yet I feel like I'm in a psycho thriller. Fuuuun... I enjoy theater, running, not dying(for the most part), and being awesome(always). Today wasn't anything special, I just decided to up and do this. Ta Da!